Dear Frank: My Momma seems to love me very much all year. But, at Christmas time she dresses me up in humiliating costumes and sends the pictures to people. Can't she tell by the look on my face that I hate this? Why does she do this to me? Does my mom hate me?
Sincerely, Henry Claus in Indiana
Dear Henry: Actually, it's quite the opposite. Dressing pets up makes humans happy. And every second you sit wearing that dumb beard and hat, it makes her doubly happy. So, this Christmas when you see the beard and hat coming out just know that it is a bizarre sign of your human's love.