My Perfect Body

Dear Frank: It seems my human only likes me for one thing - my perfect body. She's always going on about my cute legs. But there is more to me than just good looks. What can I do to show her I'm more than a handsome dog with four perfect legs?
Sincerely, Goose Goose in Indiana

Dear Goose: Being really, really good looking is hard. I should know. Here's what you do...grab yourself a copy of "Dog Tricks for Dummies" and read up. Then when she's least expecting it, dazzle her with a couple new tricks. She'll be so distracted by your mental prowess that she'll forget about handsome good looks for a while. Repeat whenever you feel like your human needs a reminder that your brain is handsome too.